Why is pornography a sin? Who am I hurting?- Part 1
Why is pornography a sin? Who am I hurting?- Part 1
To answer this question we first have to understand what sexuality in Christianity is and we have to understand that sexuality has two folds. The first one is that we will become procreators with God. We know that God is the Creator but God gives us the faculty and the power to create with Him, to create for Him but more importantly to create in Him so we share in His work and we mirror His image; that’s procreation.
The second purpose is intimacy in selfless love and we find that also images God. How? God is a Holy Trinity so each person loves the other and forced himself towards the other in ways beyond our understanding, their love is unconditional beyond truly what we can grasp. That is what selfless love is. But God is also One, He is united. We are also asked to be the same, to be united in selfless love.
So in Christianity when we get married we are united in three modes. The first one is spiritual unity where we ought to pray together as husband and wife, we ought to partake of the Eucharist together and we ought to read the Bible together(spiritual unity). The second one is the unity of the soul where we laugh, we are joyful together, we are peaceful together and we are sad together and these two are prerequisites for the third one which is the bodily unity but again the bodily unity’s purpose is to give ourselves selflessly in love to the other.
Now this is love and sexuality within Christianity. However when someone watches pornography or lusts through the eyes or the ears he removes the three modes. The first two are obvious, the third one (the bodily one) he removes the love out of it and becomes lust. There’s no unity with another person it’s all about myself (instead of being selfless it becomes something that is very selfish). That’s what lust is and pornography has at its purpose lust to feed lustful bodily desire that I have. Someone asked me why is it that God creates us in this way with that desire in us and then judges me for watching pornography or what not but the answer is quite simple. God did not create you this way; God’s creation is always good but because we fell and sinned that corruption within us puts the desire in us. We should not however, give in to that desire. God has given us the sacraments to level us and for us to regain the proper image of God within us to become since once more and therefore fight this lust within us.
So I ought to fight this corrupted desire inside of me. I need to make sure that I use my organs (that God has given me as a gift) and my senses according to their original purposes (I cannot misuse them for a corrupted purpose). If I do this I’ll be missing the mark and I will be committing sin and corrupting myself.
The church is very wise in teaching us this through baptism where we get the new man and right after we receive the chrismation where we get the holy oil of the Myron on us where the priest makes it a point to put the myroon in many different parts of our bodies, on the face and specifically he puts it on the mind so God may sanctify my thoughts. I ought to understand that I need to sanctify my thoughts as well as my eyes, my nose, my ears, my mouth and my entire senses; my being is being sanctified because now I am Holy.
St Paul says in 1 Corinthians 6:19-20: “Or do you not know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and you are not your own? For you were bought at a price; therefore glorify God in your body and in your spirit, which are God’s”
The problem is we want to live for ourselves but the purpose of humanity is to step outside yourself like with God each hypostasis loves the other I also ought to love everybody (I step outside of myself). Love is not about me but about others and since I was bought at a price by God, therefore I need to make sure and understand that these senses are His and I live for Him.
We need to be very much aware of this. We say that we are what we eat, that also applies very much spiritually where we are what we eat through our senses. So either we eat holiness and purity through my senses or I eat corruption. Whatever is inside of me has come in from my senses or has come in from my mind. So I need to be very much aware of what is inside me.
Why is purity so important? Because we are created in the image of God and God is pure and therefore I need to fight as much as I possibly can and work with God’s grace for myself to be as pure as possible because I want to be in His image, I want to be His son/ daughter.
St. John Chrysostom says: “Concerning sex we must strive for self-control. St Paul tells us to seek peace and sanctification, without which it is impossible to see the Lord. Let us pursue holiness, then, in order to attain the kingdom of heaven.”
If I want to be with God in heaven and to enjoy his presence I ought to be like him, I ought to resemble him, I ought to be pure.
Who are you hurting? Clearly yourself, you are destroying yourself but potentially you’re also hurting others. Statistics agree that 50% of divorce cases involve one party having a pornography addiction because that creates a narcissistic behavior where everything comes about me. I’m self-involved and now it’s not only in the sexual part of marriage but in all areas of marriage and if I’m not married I ought to prepare myself for my future marriage if I am willing to walk in this direction and in the meantime I give myself and love to others by serving others.
If you’re suffering from such an addiction remember that there is hope. Many have overcome by God’s grace and your turn might be the next. Hopefully potentially in the next video we can give advice on how to overcome the addiction of pornography.
Remember know your faith, live your faith and teach your faith
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